The truth behind the walls
by TIA4181
Summary: Grace's soul has been toren from her and Jane is going to find out what has happen to take the fire away from his friend.Please read and review Warning: Contains Rape.
1. Chapter 1

Grace walked in with a new air around her and it made the blonde that was lying on the couch to stir. He watched her small smile being forceful as it usually does, he knew she had her own turmoil but never really pressed her on it but this was new. Sitting up he watched her turn from Rigsby letting her smile slid and the pain to flash across her face. Noticing Jane watching her she replace the smile upon her face once again as Lisbon walked in.

"Rape murder" her face was also tired but she had fire in her eyes as she handed Cho the file.

"Stacy Kirk, twenty seven years old found this morning outside her house in the back yard." Lisbon looked to Jane and noticed his eyes looking at Van Pelt with interest. She paused a moment as his eyes strayed away from the red head and rested on her and gave her that smile.

"who found her?" Grace's voice held a sad note in it.

"How did she get out back?" Rigsby asked sitting down.

"Not sure of all the details but we should be heading to the residents now." Lisbon nodded to them and they all grab there things.

She saw Jane's eyes watching Van Pelt once again and she lagged behind." Leave her alone."

His smile grew and he broke his concentration and his smiled touched the wrinkle in around his eyes. "I am just merely interested in why Miss Van Pelt is trying to hide a bad week."

"How do you know she had a bad week? And how do you know she is trying to hide it?" he could tell he had sparked an interest in Lisbon now seeing her eyes wonder to her fellow co worker and friend.

"When she walked in she slowly glanced at the mirror then she touched under her eye. It looks as if she is hiding a bruise and her eyes are a little puffy, from crying my guess. Usually when you go away with your boyfriend for a week you are suppose to come back happy, she" he pointed "is not happy Her smile is fake with a sad undertone. Body language is off for her" he pointed to show her stiffen up as Rigsby and Cho stood on either side of her chatting. Jane was surprise to see that they had not noticed her tension, anyone with have a brain would notice but in that instance Rigsby looked sideways a her.

"Well, she might have been crying people do cry sometimes and the eye, I see no sign of a bruise and if there was it doesn't mean the worst." She stopped and turned to Jane. "listen Jane, I know you are not going to let this go but before you go pulling your not so gentle tactics let me talk to her. She saw Jane's eyes raise and his smile remained.

"You think something is amiss to" his enjoyment was exhausting.

"I think if there is you will only hurt her more." His smile slid from his face and became more

serious.

"I would never hurt Grace" he turned to see her leaning against the car trying to be involved in whatever was being said. "Willingly" Lisbon said walking towards the car.

"Van Pelt you are riding with us." Lisbon said in an authority voice which made Grace shy as she caught Jane's eye.

"Why are you watching me?" she asked him climbing in the back seeing Lisbon shake her head slightly.

"She asked" Jane slid in the front seat lowering his visor and looking in the mirror.

Staring out the window she waited for an interrogation by the smartest man she knew and the most irritating one at that. She could feel his gaze but she would not turn and look at him all she wanted to do was to forget the events of the week , the week she spent with the man she loved who she thought she would spend the rest of her life with.

"Something happened" he stated the obvious and she looked him in the eyes and gave a quick nod.

"Yes, Raymond and I are not together anymore." She paused still looking at him telling herself to control her emotions. "That is all I am saying on it Jane." His eyes raised again and she saw his game face strike up.

"K" was his reply with the snap of his visor.

She looked to see Lisbon casting her a sympatric looked and she gave her a small smile now realizing her plan had failed at least with these to it did. She knew this morning she should have called in and reported an illness but to sit alone another night stewing in a broken heart and soul would only drive her to the edge she was so close to. She put her make on with a smile to cover what was left of a fading bruise knowing well Jane might pick it out but she had a cover for that.

The hardest thing was to conceal her pain to pull it all in and let none of it show, because to let it show would be a death sentence to her heart and to her nerves to relive the worst night of her life. She saw the moment she turned that Jane was watching her and she knew then that today was going to be a difficult ride and she hoped she would survive it. She gave him a sad smile and he nodded to say game on as the car stopped and she unbuckled quickly getting out of the car.

"Van Pelt" she heard Lisbon call and she slowed down as Jane nodded to her as he passed.

"What's up boss?" she felt the need to run.

"If he bothers you to much let me know." She saw a knowing expression cross her bosses face.

"He is annoying" Lisbon nodded in agreement

"He cares"

"You mean he likes games" Grace shook her head slightly as they walked around the house. "but I am not a game" she felt her voice crack and she instantly regretted it as Lisbon stopped and looked her in the eyes.

"I may be your boss but if you ever need anything you know" Grace nodded cutting her off and she notice the small lump under her eye and a little off color about it. If Jane hadn't mentioned it earlier she would not have noticed but it was there what remained of a small bruise.

"Thanks Lisbon but I will be fine." She walked off before she could ask her about her tall tell sign of something dangerous and heartbreaking going on in this young detective life.

"Stacy's husband found her this morning" Rigsby said as Lisbon and Van Pelt approached.

"Where is he?" Van pelt asked and Rigsby pointed in the house and she saw Jane examining the body.

"Her husband was abusive" came Jane as Van Pelt started for the house but stopped and turned to look at him.

"How do you know that?" crossing her arms in front of her chest and he looked at her body language.

"The bruises that are on her arms are yellowish just like the one under her eye, there just above the cheek bone." he stood up pointing to the one under her eye and she swallowed hard turning from him and going into the house.

Now that was interesting, Jane thought to himself watching as she disappeared into the house. Things had have gone horribly wrong for her and it saddened him she was so closed off about it. He didn't know much about her admittedly but he knew enough from her body language that she would not ask for help. Women in the police field had trouble asking for help I guess it made then feel week. He wished he could get through to these two girls that he could be trusted and that he could help after all he was good with mental and emotional situations, well at least he thought he was. Maybe he wasn't but he cared to much for the both of them to ever leave them alone, plus it was a little fun to get them going but he knew when it became serious and when to really listen. Grace was different from Lisbon which would give an annoyed smile and walk off as Grace's wall were more aggressive, it was a toe to toe confrontation with the red head and that is why he never pushed her on her past knowing something bad hung around her but never that willing to push her farther. This he would, he thought there is something that is not right and it will not go away till it is out.

"What is up with Van Pelt?" Cho's voice broke through Jane's assessment of just how bad things were.

"Oh she is just trying to adjust to the single life" Jane said and earned a look from Lisbon and he saw Rigsby perk up.

"Single?" he smiled to himself and Jane walked pass him towards the house.

"How dare you accuse me of abusing my wife, who the hell do you think you are?" Jane heard Mr. Kirk's voice boomed and he quickened his pace feeling Lisbon's quicken as well.

"Explain the bruising?" Jane walked in and saw her hands on her hips glaring at him her eyes burning as he advanced on her and she flinched but kept her stance.

"Back off Van Pelt" Lisbon put herself between them eyes meeting her detective.

Jane wore his smirk and folded his arms leaning up against the wall taking in the sight. Lisbon always the ref between her detectives trying to keep them from make a career mistake or even a life threatening mistake. She was a women who cared even though it didn't show much she loved all of them and he knew it would crush her if something happen to any of them.

"But she is right" Jane got the attention off Grace as the man's tense air focused on him.

"Excuse me?" he crossed his thick arms.

"You clearly have a temper and I know for a fact if your wife came home covered in bruises you would have reported it any man would. Seeing she is a homemaker with a child she doesn't get out much and there is no police report of any sort well except of domestic dispute." the man was silent but Grace's eyes were burning. Jane's face didn't help that smile he gives as things pop in his head was dancing across his face.

"Your forgetting Jane, he is no man he probably raped her to." her voice had acid in it and it drew him up off the wall seeing the daggers in her eyes the slight shake in her stance. His face went solid and fire ripped through his veins, a feeling crept up in his heart knowing now the full extent of what happened. It was all played out right there in front of him, it was ironic that what was happening had just happen to his friend, to part of his new found family that he cared for more then he would ever say.

"You can't rape your wife" he spat with disgust on his face and she advanced as Rigsby put a hand on her and pulled her back some.

"Van Pelt out now!" Lisbon's voice raised her eyes searching her detectives and then she turn to Jane and saw his white face mixed with anger, fear and sadden realization.

"You can rape a wife, a girlfriend, or a fiancé, Mr. Kirk but you are not guilty of that she was probably to frighten to turn you down." he stated looking from Grace to Lisbon and back to the bastard he wanted to take his anger out on.

"I didn't do this to my wife" he said his demeanor fading as Grace jerked from Rigsby's hand. "Don't touch me."

"I want her out" he pointed at Van Pelt and Lisbon faced her with a set jaw. "Van Pelt if you do not leave this house right now I have you removed." she hated that she was being so forceful but it would not bode well for her young agent to go off the handle.

"Fine" she said and walked past Jane and he caught the sight of tears and he turned to follow.


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own any of this song mention of Gary Jules Mad world.

He kept his distance from her as she went around the car letting herself glance at the young women that was being put on a stretcher. Her red hair hung down her back as she leaned on the car watching me coming to confront her. Her arms crossed in front of her trying to shield me as I gave her a sad smile not trying to be annoying as I knew I always must be. She dropped her gaze and when I stopped in front of her I saw her hand brush her eyes as she looked up putting her sunglasses on.

"Go away Jane" she meant it he could see it in the way she stood. So he came to a halt just in front of her his hands in his pants pocket his face held a worried expression and then he smiled.

"You all but spoke it in there." his voice was calm and knowing and she shrugged. His eyes caring and she had to look away or the dam would break and she would not be able to piece it back together not now.

"It's just a game to you Jane" she threw her hands up and his brows frowned. "all of it, you have to just figure it out no matter how much it hurts someone." he took a step back not realizing what she thought about him because she was dead wrong.

"You really think that is why I am out here with you instead of in there?" this time he found himself crossing his arms and she shrugged.

"You always poke fun and I am tired of it." she shook her head trying hard to steady her voice, "So we are not as smart as you but that is no excuse to try and pry in our lives who cares if you can read people maybe we don't want to be read." She paused knowing she was using we a lot "I don't want you to read me." her face was red now she felt the anger in it and she knew she had wounded him and part of her felt good but she knew she would regret it later.

"I can't help it I saw the pain flash across your face this morning and it intrigued me." he paused as she motioned her hand as to say see I told you so. "Maybe that is the wrong word, but when I see someone who I ––– care about hurt I want to fix it. I want to fix the pain you are feeling Grace and I believe I know the extent of that pain. You should not have to stay silent about it, it will hurt so much more. I just want to offer you support." he was closer to her now as she bent her head and a tear fell, sunglasses catching it on the rim she felt the comforting hand on her shoulder.

She let another tear fall knowing this was not the time, the rest would be walking out of the door and she could not let them see her fall apart to see her week. She stood up and turned to Jane seeing his face somber and yes, caring.

"Not right now, not here" she took a deep breath and before she knew it he had taken her glasses of unleashed the trapped tears.

"If you ever need anything I am here, I told Lisbon this once and I am telling you I will be here for you no matter what." he brushed the tear away as he heard the agents walking out of the house and handed Grace her glasses back.

"Deep breath" he said as they watched Lisbon walking purposely up to them.

"I need to know your head is in this today Van Pelt!" her voice was hard and Grace nodded as she saw Jane edge away a little.

"What happened in there can not happen again, understand" it was not a question but an order and she nodded again swallowing hard cursing herself for not getting better control of her emotion.

"If you can't you can go home" Jane put a hand on Lisbon shoulder and she brushed it off.

"I am sorry Lisbon I just lost it." Lisbon's face was still set firm but her posture was more composed. She had not see Van Pelt go off like that before and it scared her a bit but she needed to know it was inexcusable and it could lead to a reprimand and job loss if he decided to report her. "No more" her face was serious

"Yes, boss" she looked to Jane who gave her that Jane smile and she took a deep breath.

"So where are we at?" Jane asked his spirits in good form. Grace wish she was able to do that to be able to switch her moods and be convincing. She could see in his eyes he was worried about her and she knew he would press more but hoped that for today he would leave it.

"Stacy had a very laid out routine she was an easy target and he left nothing behind." Lisbon sighed looking around.

"He must have known her" Cho said looking around see the neighbors standing on the road.

"he could be hear right now" Rigsby came over to stand in the tight circle.

"She was always at the fruit market by six to get fresh fruit for her husband."

"He likes it fresh" Jane jumped in

"Yes that is what it usually means." Lisbon sounded tired and it was only noon.

"Well, it also means when he says she was there by six it means right at that time and no home no later then" Cho cut him off.

"Six forty five but how did you know"

"He is not just abusive he has a sadistic personality disorder" Jane looked back to the house seeing him holding the two year old. The boy laid his head on his fathers shoulder not knowing really what was going on. Jane felt his stomach cramp at the thought this women had lived through and what the autopsy would reveal.

"That maybe so but this murder doesn't point to him so we have to start at the beginning of her day. Jane and Grace you to make your way to the market and get surveillance, Rigsby and Cho you are with me we are going to look in this house further." She nodded at them as they all agreed.

Lisbon handed the keys to Jane and confusion crossed is face. "She is way to upset to drive but you don't go to fast." she pointed at him and let the keys fall into his hand and he smiled his boyish grin and Van Pelt rolled her eyes.

"Play nice" she said to the both of them as she headed back to the house.

She knew Jane was the best person for Van Pelt at this moment because she had watched them from the window once Mr. Kirk had to get his son from the room. She saw the way Jane stopped, the anger in the face of the agent and then the caring in the consultants face. She knew he no matter what he thought, she knew that he cared for them all just as she does and it would be hard then he thinks to throw it all away.

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Jane pulled out of the Kirks and right behind them left the ambulance with the women who was probably better off dead then she would be under a husband like that. Was she better off dead? Listen to yourself! She yelled at her self in her head. No, suicide is not the answer never is and if she did commit it he would be winning." Remember that" she heard her voice.

Shit, did I really say that? She looked to Jane and saw a sideways glance as she felt the car slow. Great she did say it out loud and now Jane had an all to familiar look on his face.

"Remember what?" his voice was light.

"Nothing?" she peered over to the speed miter

"you are giving your self advice but what about?" he said it more to himself and then he looked back over.

"Jane can't you go faster?" she press the button on the window and it zoomed downward.

"You always complain about me going to fast and Lisbon to" he pressed his foot to the paddle deciding not to press any further.

"So what is your take on the husband" she clinched her teeth trying control herself and Jane smiled.

"He didn't do it." he sounded certain "he maybe sadistic but I don't think he could do it physically himself, I should say." he pulled off a small road and she saw a dated looking store up ahead.

"So you think he did have a hand in it?"

"Yes, but I am not sure if we can prove it." he pulled into a parking space put the car in park. Getting out she saw him glance at her.

"Jane I am okay" she paused at the look she got. " for now but I can't do my job and talking about what happened, so please can we talk later?" it was more pleading then she wanted to be.

"I will not push anymore if you promise we will talk later." she just looked at him for a moment and knew there was no way around talking to him and if she didn't he would never shut up.

"I have no other choice." she replied slamming the door as he came around joining her.

"No, you really don't." he gave a small laugh then added "If you haven't notice I am persistent."

"To say the least" she added as they went into the shop.

She was not surprise to only a few people in there is was quiet a small shop but none the less it reminded her of home. She drew in the smell of the fruit and when she opened her eyes she saw his smile dancing on his mouth. She nodded her head over to the skirt clad women giving a girl some direction on how to stack the fruit.

"I am Agent Van Pelt form CBI" she flashed her badge and the women stood with full attention.

"I am Patrick Jane" he inclined his head with the innocent smile.

"Angie Wright" she offered and the with a hand signaled to follow her to a back door.

"What is this about?" she asked as we entered the small back hallway and down to a larger room.

"Well we were wondering if you knew Mr. and Mrs. Kirk?" Van Pelt asked standing against the wall.

"Justice Kirk is such a sweet man." she said in such niceness that Van Pelt gave a short menacing laugh.

"What a fitting name" Jane smiled at Van Pelt and she nodded in agreement.

"What about Stacy?" Van Pelt asked and got a total different emotion.

"Real witch that one" she paused raising her eyebrow "you know she was so dumb witted we had to keep tips on her and make sure she was not putting herself in harms way."

"You reported to her husband?" disgust dripped from the words and Grace could imagine what her face looked like.

"Of course dear it was for her own good." her head shook a little and Jane could see this upset Grace.

"This morning did anything happen unusual?" Jane asked his forehead wrinkled as he gave Grace a small shake of his head.

"No, Stacy came in and bought some fresh strawberries and blueberries" she walked over and poured herself a cup of coffee.

"Help yourselves" she gestured to the pot.

"That ok Mrs. Wright" Jane replied

"He did call to see if she had left which he only does when she is running late"

"Did you see anyone following her or anyone lurking the past couple of days?" she asked she noticed the girl standing in the hallway.

"Leah" she gestured

"Yes ma'am?" she asked politely

"Did Mrs. Kirk have a lurker?"

"Well I noticed a few day ago a blue truck dodge I believe, well he was sitting outside staring at her she flushed when I mentioned it." she folded her hands in front of her.

"Did you see after that yesterday I saw him again but only driving in front of the store."

"You have video?" Grace asked and the women nodded.

"Can we have the footage?"

"Of course do you want them all?"

"All?" Grace asked and she opened a box.

"If you don't mind"

"No dear not at all but may I ask what this is about?"

"Didn't you hear ma'am? Mrs. Kirk was Murder and raped in her very own front yard." Leah said with some excitement at having something to tell someone about,

"You don't think that sweet husband of her did it do you?" she cupped her hands to her mouth.

Sighing Grace rolled her eyes "You do know he was beating her every time you guys reported something he didn't like?"

"Thank you for your time we will be going." Jane said taking the tape and putting his hand on the small of her back leading her to the door which made her jump and he retracted his hand with a apologetic glance.

"So he had insiders" Grace said dialing the phone as they reached the outside sitting the box on the ground.

Her hair shined as the sun touched it and Jane noticed just how beautiful she was. She explained the details they just got when she dropped her glasses. He caught a flash of a reddened circle as her hair fell away from her collar exposing the back of her neck. She clicked the phone shut seeing Jane staring at the back of her head she quickly fixed her hair.

"Lisbon wants us to go back the office and get started on these." she pointed to the box that was sitting on the ground.

"You broke your glasses" Jane said cocking his head to the side.

"I can fix them" she said shielding her eye from the sun.

"How bad did he hurt you?" he couldn't help himself he had caught the glimpse of the nastiness of it and he wanted to track down the man who hurt her.

She looked at his face and took a deep breath. "To the point I am not sure if I am going to survive and with you asking me every change you get to drag the memories up is going to make me break."

He was shocked because that has to be the most honest thing she had ever said to him. His heart hurt for her as he saw a tear fall from the corner of her eyes and he wiped it with his thump. She grabbed the box and headed to the car and he followed still not saying anything taking in the severity of her words. She don't think she can survive, he was right then Raymond not only hurt her but he took away her will to live and if anything happen to her he would find him and take away his will.

"You will survive" he finally said as he pulled out of the small stores parking lot and head back to the office. " You have me and I will not let you fail."

She smiled at him and turned the radio then back off when the lyrics came on from Gary Jules Mad world

"_The dreams in which I am dying are the best I ever had"_

Jane glanced at her and she took another deep breath feeling the car speed up she knew he had pushed the peddle down. He glanced over to her seeing her hair blow in the breeze he was hoping to see the reddened mark but she caught him and push her button up and sat back looking at him.

"Jane after you catch Red John what are you going to do?" she was curious to know what his plans were.

"I don't know I suppose I will be in jail or dead" he shrugged like nothing.

"How can you be so nonchalant about something like that?" Grace knew the story and could only imagine the pain he went through.

"He hurt my family and I will hurt him." he took a deep breath

"how many spots like that do you have?" he asked and raised an eyebrow and she looked out the window.

"I answered your question now answer mine only fair." he said as he pulled into a parking lot and stopped her from unbuckling.

"A lot" she looked down feeling embarrassed and pulled her buckle off her and went to get out when his hand stopped her.

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about" his look was gentle and she nodded sadly getting out with the box of tapes.

"I will order pizza when we get up" he said as he pushed the elevator button.

"I am not that hungry" she shook her head feeling more tired then anything. The first night after the rape and beating she could not sleep and on the second night she fell asleep only to wake gasping for air. Even last night was a fitful one and she knew she had to get a good nights sleep.

"Yes, you have to be we haven't eaten today and I know what a tragedy can bring on someone so I know you probably haven't had much since that horrible night." his eyes squinted looking at her and she nodded.

"Pizza then" he walked out of the elevator and she followed as he dialed the number.

She pulled the TV to the couch area and sat the box down popping the first one in and stared at the screen looking for any signs of the blue truck. They hadn't spotted it by the time the pizza came and after struggling the first slice down she felt sick. They were on the fourth one when Lisbon called and told them that they had found some pretty disturbing things in there house and would debrief them in the morning, they could go home and rest up. Rubbing her eyes she turned to Jane and was glad that most of there night together had been in silence even though he gave her grief about not having another slice but gave it up when he saw she might actually be sick.

"So who's turn is it?" he asked sitting down next to her with a cup of hot tea.

"Turn?" she was puzzled

"Mine" he smile "So did you go to the police?"

"Jane I don't want to play this game." she shook her head.

"Course you didn't you are the police" he smiled and sipped his hot tea "You said you would talk and I know you really don't want to go home"

She sighed knowing he was right and maybe it would help. "Fine but it's my turn"

He smiled " You like Lisbon" it was more of a statement and he blushed a little.

"She is a good friend" she gave him a look and he laughed for a moment and sat down his cup beside the TV.

"Yes, there is something there but it can never be" he said sadly.

"But why?" he shook his head

"My turn" he turn to her his face serious and her heart thumped maybe she should go home. " was this the first time he hurt you?"

"Like this yes" her emotions were in check but she could see another question burning in his eyes.

"Do you think your wife would be upset if you fell for Lisbon?"

"No, she would be happy actually that I moved on but it isn't going to happen" I bit my lip waiting for the next question as he started into my eyes read my nerves trying to see how much he could push till I broke and I think that is what he wants from me.

"Have you ever been hurt like this by someone else?" his question was like a slap in the face she stood up quickly breathing hard and he was standing next to her.

"How did you know?" she could help but ask.

"I know things" she took her purse from the chair and went to leave when her grabbed her.

"Say it" his voice stern like a father would sound to a daughter when he needed her to do something desperately.

"Please Jane" she said feeling the tears creeping up with a lump in her throat.

"You have to say it out loud or the pain will kill you" he would not letting her arm go as she stared deep in his eye and his in hers reading every inch of her soul.

Her gaze drop to the ground and she felt herself shutter "He raped me" and the dam came undone tears spilled out non stop as I felt his arms go round me I didn't want this his compassion, his pity, the only thing I wanted was to crawl in a black hole and perish but I could not stop. I clung to his shirt as my heart broke with raw pain.

"It's okay Grace" he held me tight against him as if his life depended on it my head buried in his should my arms around him I could not stop. It felt like forever when my body ached from the beating and the raped as Jane hugged me tight and I loosen my grip and he did the same I looked in his blue eyes to see a loving smile in them as he tucked my hair behind my shoulder with one hand still on my upper arm.

"I am sorry Jane" his face furrowed and he shook his head as I looked to the ground.

"Sorry? No never you need to cry and you will again" he gently lifted my head up to meet his eyes.

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about so I want you to look me in the eyes okay" she nodded and he let go.

"Keep looking because I want you to hear this" he kept her gaze "You are going to get through this I am hear" he patted his chest. "I am real and I will not leave you"

"I loved him" she heard herself say and he lead her to the sofa and she sat down with him.

"Tell me everything" his eye were gentle and his hands was on hers reassuringly. She nodded and knew it was okay with him.

**Sorry I have to leave it here but next chapter she will tell her story and break her silence.**


	3. Flashback

As she sat there looking into his eyes seeing compassion she felt safe. Why she didn't know, she knew he would be a pain once he had figured out something was wrong with her it's Patrick Jane he had to know. She thought she would be having this conversation with a women, Lisbon? No not even her but someone else other then the man sitting next to her waiting for her to relive the night she wish she could forget. He hands felt small in his but knew it was only because that is how she felt at the moment. His hands were on hers gently but had a firmness to them to let her know she was okay. His smile was now gone his face was set and all she wanted to do was die. She felt the urge to grab her gun and end it but the Flash of Raymond's face shot across her face and her eyes dropped to the ground.

"Grace" his voice was soft as he let her hands fall and she looked up.

"If you don't want to do this tonight I understand." I looked into his eyes and for some reason it just happened.

_Flashback_

"_Gracie," Raymond's spiky dark hair hung limp in the water as she swam to her fiancé. Her heart light as the sun was getting lower._

"_This is the best time I think I have ever had." she kissed him as her hair floated around her. She loved him so much and could not think of a better guy. His dark eyes with and high cheekbones was shined as the sun hit his face. He could go nowhere without other girls casting him glances and whispering. She wondered how she got so lucky to have met such a wonder and handsome man. Her family all loved him he fit like a clove into her life. _

"_Wait till tonight." he smiled with a twinkle in his eye._

"_What do you have planned for tonight?" she played knowing he was going to try tonight but she wanted to wait till she was married and would not give that up. He smiled at her and his hands wandered under the water, she pushed from him her smile fell._

"_Ray, I thought you said you would wait." she started to swim to the shore as she felt her leg being pulled under and took a deep breath just in time._

_She saw his eyes as dark as a raven's feather his hold on her hurt as she struggled to get away. She kicked and thrashed as he held her there, determination on his face and she felt her lungs giving out and she kicked as hard as she could make his grip let go and she swam as hard and fast breaking the surface of the water gasping as she swam tears flowing down her face. What was he doing? She felt her arms ach where he held her and knew bruises would be forming. She felt her foot hit the sandy floor as she started to run the water holding her back and she tripped felling her heart race._

"_Grace!" she heard him behind her, looking around she cursed herself for letting him take her to a secret part of the beach. She looked behind her to see him gaining speed and willed herself to go faster._

"_I am sorry Grace" he yelled his voice strained and she stopped when the water was at there ankles._

"_What the hell was that Raymond?" tears falling fast her heart hurt from his actions and the look he gave sacred her but she knew Raymond and knew he loved her._

"_I love you Grace" he caught up to her she backed up a little rubbing her arms seeing the bruises forming of his fingers._

"_Then what the hell was that?" her voice caught a little as her lungs burned._

"_It just I want you and this wait till marriage is ridiculous." his eyes flashed for a moment and she took another step back._

"_I told you how I felt and you were okay with it." she had anger in her heart now squinting her eyes._

"_Yeah well your not so pure you let what's his name get into your pants." his words were like a slap in the face and her mouth was open before she gained her composure._

"_I didn't let him and you know that I can't believe you would even say that, I thought you loved me." her teeth clinched she had trusted him with a secret no one knew she never spoke of the day she was attacked by a childhood friend and he had not exceeded in his crime but none the less he took from her the trust she thought she would never give anyone till she meet Raymond._

"_I thought you loved me" he advanced on her and she stumbled backwards knowing now she could be in trouble._

"_I do you are my everything Raymond but I don't know now." she heard it come out before she could stop it and the look that ran across his face sent chills through her as the sun's rays touched the surface of the water._

"_You are ending us?" he said and she could not answer but he knew and before she had time to react she felt a stinging run across her cheekbone and the ground connecting with her body as she trashed trying to fight him off._

"_You will give it you tease, you fucking bitch." he hit her over and over ripping and tearing._

_She fought till it was over and when he finally got up he stood over her watching her pain she curled up in the water sobbing as the last light died. Her body ached and she could not silence herself her life had been ripped out of her very soul. She didn't know what to do she did know how she was going to pick herself up and move on after this. Jason was one thing she pulled through but this burned her he took something away from her she would never get back he took everything. She saw him smiling rinsing his self off in the water then walking over her he bent down grabbing her behind the neck._

"_Now were done, You report this they will all laugh at you. You are nothing, ugly and don't even make up for it in bed." he threw her back down and spit walking away he turned "Why don't you end it know."_

_End Flashback._

She finished remembering the long and painful walk back to the hotel to see Raymond sitting at the bar laughing with some other girls. Jane's eyes now had tears in them as she bent over with her on his shoulder still crying from the story. He wanted to kill Raymond he wanted Raymond to pay for the pain he had caused his friend and if Grace was willing he would help her. She pulled up from him the pain was clear the want of death hung around her thick he sensed it after all he was a mentalist and from experience he noticed it. Would she do it? He Didn't think so but it wasn't because she didn't want it but because he wanted her to and her revenge is her alive knowing she threaten his reputation. Her hair was stuck to her face wet from her tears and he moved them letting a small sad smile play on his mouth. His thumb ran over what was left of the fading bruise on her eye and she swallowed hard.

"We can get him back." she heard his voice and he was enraged and her heart fluttered picturing them killing him and both being locked away and him never getting revenge on red john. She shook her head more tears spilling from her eyes.

"I didn't want to have sex before marriage Jane there is no way I could kill him." a smile spread over his lips and she grabbed his hands.

"You leave him alone Jane, you cannot do anything to him." she said desperately and he ran his hand down the side of his face.

"I wont touch him" his smile still danced on his mouth as he looked to the beautiful women whom he had never seen hurt so bad. Grace knew he didn't have to touch him to hurt him and she couldn't be responsible for Jane doing anything either.

"I will go to Lisbon." her heart hurt thinking of retelling her story, reliving it over.

"You don't have to"

"I can't be responsible for you hurting him Jane, I could not live with myself." more tears ran down her face and he stood up pulling her with him.

"You would not be responsible Grace it was him who would be responsible." his eyes had fire behind them as he lead her over to a video recorder that she had not noticed before.

"What did you do?" she say concern on his face. He wondered if he had broken her trust but her could not tell.

"I figured once you told your story to relive it would be just as cruel and had a feeling you might want the right kind of revenge." his voice held strong but she could her the roughness and knew the impact of her story on him.

"Why do you care?" she was a little angry about being taped but was also relived she would not have to fall apart when she went to her boss.

"There are certain people in the world who deserve the best and you are one of them. You are not worthless, ugly, or even evil in anyway. You care and do what is right and people take advantage of that. I care only about a certain amount of people and you Van Pelt are one of those." he picked her chin up because she had looked down feeling uncomfortable about the praise and the feeling of having someone.

"And you are not alone no matter how much you feel you are you are not alone." his eyes smiled he took the tape out.

"We can go tonight if you like and get it done" he said handing her jacket to her. He knew in the morning the urge to go to Lisbon would wear off and he knew if it did her would be on the man doorstep and even though he wanted to kill him he needed revenge on red john and could not do that from prison.

"It's late" she said but his cell was already dialed.

"Lisbon, I know it's late but again I know you are not sleeping" he stopped and his face lit up and she heard her bosses playful voice on the other end.

"Good Grace and I are awake and needed to talk to you." his demeanor changed and became less playful and more serious.

"She has something she needs to talk to you about." I felt my hand shake and felt his hand on my shoulder letting me know it was okay.

"We will be over." he snapped the phone shut and turned to her.

"I will be there and you don't have to talk" he held up the tape and she felt embarrassed knowing what a mess she must have looked like.

"There is nothing to be embarrassed by" he said again

"You wasn't raped and had to relive it in front of a camera and now have to go to your boss and show what a mess you are." she said with more anger then she had thought she had in her.

"You don't have to show her the tape you don't even have to do this but if you let him get away with it her will do it again. I will not let that happen do you hear me?" his voice was strong and reassuring and she nodded taking the tape.

"Your right Jane lets go." and she lead the way with him close behind her ready to be a rock for her again.


	4. Lisbon's place

**AN/ I was not sure if Lisbon lived in a house or Apartment and I am sorry if I got it wrong. I hope it doesn't bother you to much and I hope you like this chapter. Let me know and enjoy.**

The drive to Lisbon's was silent, he didn't want to push her much more then he already was, he wasn't to sure her breaking point but he knew she was close. He saw out of the corner of his eye the sadness that etched itself on her face and one that might fade with time, once she knew how to conceal it but it would never leave her. Keeping his eyes on the rainy nights road, in his opinion was only fitting for this evenings events was hard, all he wanted to do was to comfort her but knew nothing right now would. The bad thing about being as observant as he was only made it worst. When she relived the rape it was as if he was there not able to do anything and that killed him. He stole another glance seeing the loss she felt and he remembered his wife and daughter. What a pair they made, both their souls gone in different tragedies but all the same his stolen from him the night his wife and child where murder and hers was stolen from her by the one she loved and trusted, the light was snuffed out behind her eyes, making them dull and her face pale. He pulled into Lisbon's and park looking over at the red hair beauty.

"I am sorry this happen to you." he was sincere and felt stupid for saying what he just did but he needed to say it. She turned to him and he tucked a piece of hair behind her ear noticing how tired she looked.

"I know you are" she dropped her gaze as a light came on. "I just want this to get over with, and I want to forget it ever happened." Jane felt himself smile and she looked up.

"I will help you trust again Grace, but you will never forget." his voice gentle as he turned the engine off.

"I know" was her reply as she open the door seeing Lisbon standing on the porch with the light shinning on her silky black hair.

Jane waited for her to come beside him and he placed a gentle hand on the middle of her back slowly walking up with him. He noticed Lisbon had not changed her clothes from earlier and this sparked some interest that he had to push down, this was about Grace tonight and tomorrow he will poke at his favorite boss. Lisbon had her arms folded and her expression was of concern as she looked from Jane to her rookie detective seeing the pain that was clearly visible now.

She saw the sadness behind Jane's eyes as they came to a halt in front of her, he gave her a soft smile but she could not take her eyes away from Grace, all the sadness was tearing her heart apart. She moved aside and open the door as Jane came up the stairs without a glance and went into her house holding a small video tape in his hand. Grace slowly came up the stairs and went to pass when Lisbon put her hand on her gently.

"Are you okay?" her voice was a whisper her eyes searching, wishing she knew the extent of what was happening. A tear appeared in the corner of Grace's eye and slid down without pause to fall and she gently rubbed her arm.

"Can I use your bathroom?" the light hit her face and Lisbon saw the yellowish bruise Jane had pointed out to her earlier, She now regretted not going back to the office to check up on her.

"Its down the hall to your right." she pointed as Grace nodded a little and toward the bathroom hearing the TV go on.

She couldn't take it, she wouldn't go back in there she was so tired, her head ached from the crying, reliving everything she wanted to keep in. How did she get here? She was suppose to put on a brave face together and get through this day but it went wrong, all of it did. She heard the voice on the TV and knew her sobbing as she told Jane the most privet and embarrassing thing, bearing her dead soul. She wondered her bosses reaction as she could only imagine what she looked like on the tape, because looking into Lisbon's mirror was not to pretty. She saw a pale and blotched face in front of her, weak with emotions, ones she never wanted to show. Her Dad taught her that, being a football coaches daughter you learn to suck up the parts of life you don't like and she just failed miserably.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

"Jane what is this about?" Lisbon's voice held authority, concern, and sorrow. He stepped back to glance at her amazed at this women's ability to be strong. She went through hell growing up and here she is pulled together intact and a head of CBI. This is someone Grace could learn from, someone he could learn from. He smiled at his boss and pushed the tape in.

"You will see," he switched the TV on stepping back and taking a spot closer to Lisbon. A dread filled his heart when he saw the tape flip through the questions that Grace had asked him stealing a glance from Lisbon taking in her reaction. Which was not what he had expected and that usually doesn't happen. She was understanding and she looked at him and then back to his question.

"Have you been hurt like this before?" she saw Grace shoot up off the couch with Jane seconds beside her. Lisbon's hear sank at not being able to seen what Jane had been able to , the knowing danced a crossed his face and Lisbon saw the look of concern as he prodded her agent to say it. Lisbon could only see some of Grace's profile and she saw the panic in her face to free herself from Jane, then she turned and all you could see was Graces long red hair. She heard the three words she wish she hadn't, "He raped me" and the sight of her clinging for what life she had left to the man that stood beside her was unbarable. She saw the young women's body shake with sobs, Jane stood there holding her, tears ran down his cheeks as he tried to keep her together.

Lisbon watch as his pain and emotion showed and the love he held for Grace. She wanted to go to her now and put an arm around her, to see this women fall apart when all Lisbon had seen of her was the bubbly happy Van Pelt, it tore her to the core to see her hurting so much. She remembered the first time she meet the upbeat Grace Van Pelt, thinking oh god I have to put up with little miss sunshine, and now to see her break like this, her thoughts trailed off as she saw Grace let go of Jane. Lisbon felt a hand on her and noticed she had started to cry herself as Jane took Grace to the couch and she for the first time saw the blotched face in so much pain.

"You want to take a minute?" he asked as she wiped her tears and shook her head, after all Grace lived this nightmare she was about to tell, to expose all this to the people she worked with, ones that were as close as family had to be excruciating.

"She didn't get to take a break" she said just as Grace dove head first into the reliving and the blank expression that came over Jane's face one Lisbon knew was going to be trouble. She watched in shock at the details of the man she ate next to at parties, at Grace's house when she invited everyone over to meet the man claimed to have loved her. Raymond the lawyer, the good looking man who would walk in a room and lift it up. She remembered thinking, Wow think of there children, both of them annoyingly upbeat.

She looked at Jane who's face was emotionless and the only time she saw it that way was when he was thinking of his Wife and Daughter. She saw a flash in his eyes as Grace's sobbing became uncontrollable as she relived what all women fear, turning back to the TV she saw Grace's eyes flash to the gun at her side and Lisbon looked up as Jane was telling her he would not harm this man. Jane had caught it to and was already taking off down the hall with Lisbon right at his heals.

He burst into the bathroom to find it empty and Lisbon looked to the front door but it was not open and they would have heard it. Jane Felt his heart beating dangerously fast as he walked past the bathroom and into a bed room. He felt relief wash over him, feeling tears in his eyes as he saw the broken women asleep on Lisbon bed, gun in hand but still breathing. A tear was resting on her nose as Lisbon went over and slowly took the gun from her hand.

Was she close? He wondered to himself as Lisbon nodded to the door and he followed her out of the room his eyes still on Grace, wondering if he had pushed her to far. He slowly walked behind Lisbon and when they reached the kitchen she sat the gun down rubbing her hands over her face.

"You," she pointed the burden of Grace's attack on her face "Can't make this worst and take revenge out, do you hear me?" authority was thick in her voice mixed with pleading. "Do you?"

"Yes, but only because I don't want Grace to feel responsible for my actions." his face was strong and hatred filled the lines in them. No smile danced on his mouth like it always did.

"You think she will try again?" Lisbon let her sternness drop, she knew Jane was being truthful and also knew that was the only thing stopping him from killing Raymond, making him suffer the way Grace was.

"No," he was certain

"How do you know?" Lisbon wasn't sure if she should take his advice on this. "You wasn't to sure a minute ago." the feeling from just a moment ago was flashed again and she took a deep breath.

"She would, but it is what he wants her to do." a evil knowing smile played at the corner of his lips."If she killed herself he would not have to worry about her silence. She knew if she pulled that trigger, he would be winning and he could get away with it Scott free."

"Why didn't I see this earlier? Back at the house?" Lisbon felt a small bit of guilt creep up having yelled at her, she must have been in so much pain to lash out like that at Mr. Kirk.

"You where doing your job" he caught her eye " Plus it is my job to catch things like that." he gave her a smile and she shook her head.

"Is she going to come through this?" Lisbon kept seeing the broken face and the sobbing.

"I am a hundred percent sure she will not kill herself" he walked to the table and sat down.

"A hundred?" Lisbon sat down across from him.

"She also didn't pull that trigger because she knew we would blame ourselves, and each other for letting her be alone with her gun. She only came here tonight because she didn't want me to take a life I am so willing to take for her. She would rather relive the pain of her story to you, then for me to take revenge." He sat back and folded his hands over his knee.

" You taped her so you could see how damaged she was, if she decided not to come here what would you have done?" Lisbon was amazed again at how observant and smart he was.

"That, I don't know" he lied and she didn't press for the truth, because she didn't want to know.

He watched Lisbon run through her thoughts, her eyes flicking towards the TV room, knowing she was replaying the tape in her mind. He asked himself, "what would you have done" he knew the moment everything he expected had been laid out, he would drop Grace off at Lisbon's with the tape and would have paid Raymond a visit and let him bleed to death very slowly. Grace was broken yes, would she come back from this? Maybe, but he knew deep down she would not take her life, Grace Van Pelt was in there, not all of her but the caring side would not go away from her. He knew that now and that is why he would not put anymore burdned on her by taking the revenge he craved.


End file.
